Authors - Ellen DeGeneres

Browse all of these

Quote 329by Anonymous on 27/12/2010

Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.
   Comments (0) Topics:

    Quote 768by Anonymous on 07/01/2011

    My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-five now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
       Comments (0) Topics:

      Quote 5261by Anonymous on 08/06/2011

      Sometimes when I am driving I get so angry at inconsiderate drivers that I want to scream at them. But then I remember how insignificant that is, and I thank God that I have a car and my health and gas. That was phrased wrong - normally you wouldn't say, thank God I have gas.
         Comments (0) Topics:

        Quote 6405by Anonymous on 19/09/2011

        I was in yoga the other day. I was in full lotus position. My chakras were all aligned. My mind is cleared of all clatter and I'm looking out of my third eye and everything that I'm supposed to be doing. It's amazing what comes up, when you sit in that silence. 'Mama keeps whites bright like the sunlight, Mama's got the magic of Clorox 2.'
           Comments (0) Topics:

          Quote 6887by Anonymous on 13/10/2011

          Really, he called me that? Ellen DeGenerate? I've been getting that since fourth grade. I guess I'm happy I could give him work.
             Comments (0) Topics:

            Quote 8339by Anonymous on 06/05/2012

            I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut.
               Comments (0) Topics:

              Quote 9163by Anonymous on 23/06/2012

              My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
                 Comments (0) Topics:

                Quote 10263by Anonymous on 25/09/2012

                I auditioned on my own. I tried to make a mark for myself without anybody's help, not even Mom's.
                   Comments (0) Topics:

                  Quote 12597by Anonymous on 30/04/2013

                  People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
                     Comments (0) Topics:

                    Statistics:

                    Advertisement: