Authors - Homer Simpson

Brief Biography

Homer Jay Simpson is a fictional main character in the animated television series The Simpsons and the patriarch of the eponymous family. He is voiced by Dan Castellaneta and first appeared on television, along with the rest of his family, in The Tracey Ullman Show short "Good Night" on April 19, 1987. Homer was created and designed by cartoonist Matt Groening while he was waiting in the lobby of James L. Brooks' office. Groening had been called to pitch a series of shorts based on his comic strip Life in Hell but instead decided to create a new set of characters. He named the character after his father, Homer Groening. After appearing for three seasons on The Tracey Ullman Show, the Simpson family got their own series on Fox that debuted December 17, 1989. - Wikipedia

Quotes by Homer SimpsonBrowse all of these

Quote 797by Anonymous on 07/01/2011

No, no, no, Lisa. If adults don't like their jobs, they don't go on strike. They just go in every day and do it really half-assed.
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    Quote 866by Anonymous on 08/01/2011

    The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother! I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws!
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      Quote 1206by Anonymous on 11/01/2011

      Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
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        Quote 1568by Anonymous on 14/01/2011

        When I first heard that Marge was joining the police academy, I thought it would be fun and zany, like that movie Spaceballs. But instead it was dark and disturbing. Like that movie -- Police Academy.
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          Quote 1704by Anonymous on 15/01/2011

          I've got more trophies than Wayne Gretzky & The Pope combined!
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            Quote 1778by Anonymous on 16/01/2011

            I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!
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              Quote 1844by Anonymous on 16/01/2011

              Haven't you learned anything from that guy that gives those sermons in church? Captain What's-his-name. We live in a society of laws, why do you think I took you to see all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughing! Did you? Except at that guy who made sound effects. Vroom! Beep! Honk! Honk! Ha-ha. Where was I? Oh yeah, stay out of my booze!
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                Quote 2107by Anonymous on 22/01/2011

                Kids, just because I don't care doesn't mean I'm not listening.
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                  Quote 2507by Anonymous on 31/01/2011

                  Let us celebrate our agreement with the adding of chocolate to milk.
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                    Quote 2888by Anonymous on 03/02/2011

                    Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.
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                      Quote 2895by Anonymous on 03/02/2011

                      If God didn't want us to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat?
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                        Quote 3040by Anonymous on 03/02/2011

                        If he's so smart, how come he's dead?
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                          Quote 3748by Anonymous on 09/02/2011

                          I'm not popular enough to be different.
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                            Quote 3815by Anonymous on 10/02/2011

                            English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England.
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                              Quote 4031by Anonymous on 12/02/2011

                              What is a wedding? Webster's dictionary defines a wedding as 'the process of removing weeds from one's garden.'
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                                Quote 4418by Anonymous on 21/02/2011

                                I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was called, 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down.'
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                                  Quote 4648by Anonymous on 25/02/2011

                                  Look, all I'm saying is, if these big stars didn't want people going through their garbage and saying they're gay, then they shouldn't have tried to express themselves creatively.
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                                    Quote 4665by Anonymous on 25/02/2011

                                    I'm like that guy who single-handedly built the rocket & flew to the moon! What was his name? Apollo Creed?
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                                      Portrait of Homer Simpson