Authors - Rita Rudner

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Quote 767by Anonymous on 07/01/2011

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.
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    Quote 876by Anonymous on 08/01/2011

    I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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      Quote 1274by Anonymous on 11/01/2011

      Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them.
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        Quote 7741by Anonymous on 03/02/2012

        My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
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          Quote 8319by Anonymous on 04/05/2012

          I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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            Quote 8446by Anonymous on 13/05/2012

            I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.
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              Quote 9391by Anonymous on 22/07/2012

              My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.
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                Quote 9543by Anonymous on 02/08/2012

                I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?
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                  Quote 10776by Anonymous on 27/10/2012

                  In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
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                    Quote 11379by Anonymous on 25/12/2012

                    We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.
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                      Quote 12247by Anonymous on 20/03/2013

                      I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
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                        Quote 12593by Anonymous on 01/05/2013

                        Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
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