Authors - Ambrose Bierce
Brief Biography
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce (June 24, 1842 - unknown) was an American editorialist, journalist, short story writer, fabulist, and satirist. Today, he is probably best-known for his short story "An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" and his satirical lexicon The Devil's Dictionary. His vehemence as a critic, his motto "Nothing matters" and the sardonic view of human nature that informed his work all earned him the nickname "Bitter Bierce". - Wikipedia
Quotes by Ambrose BierceBrowse all of these
Quote 1398by Anonymous on 12/01/2011
The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
Quote 2194by Anonymous on 24/01/2011
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
Quote 2213by Anonymous on 24/01/2011
PRESIDENCY, n. The greased pig in the field game of American politics.
Quote 2299by Anonymous on 27/01/2011
In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
Quote 2866by Anonymous on 03/02/2011
The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of knowledge.
Quote 2952by Anonymous on 03/02/2011
I think that a young state, like a young virgin, should modestly stay at home, and wait the application of suitors for an alliance with her; and not run about offering her amity to all the world; and hazarding their refusal. Our virgin is a jolly one; and tho at present not very rich, will in time be a great fortune, and where she has a favorable predisposition, it seems to me well worth cultivating.
Quote 3074by Anonymous on 03/02/2011
Being is desirable because it is identical with Beauty, and Beauty is loved because it is Being. We ourselves possess Beauty when we are true to our own being; ugliness is in going over to another order; knowing ourselves, we are beautiful; in self-ignorance, we are ugly.
Quote 3122by Anonymous on 03/02/2011
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
Quote 3145by Anonymous on 03/02/2011
Wedding: a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
Quote 3198by Anonymous on 05/02/2011
Admiration. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
Quote 3837by Anonymous on 12/02/2011
A grave is a place where the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student.
Quote 4037by Anonymous on 12/02/2011
Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
Quote 4062by Anonymous on 13/02/2011
We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over.
Quote 4363by Anonymous on 20/02/2011
Ocean: A body of water occupying 2/3 of a world made for man...who has no gills.
Quote 4503by Anonymous on 22/02/2011
Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
Quote 4690by Anonymous on 25/02/2011
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
Quote 4707by Anonymous on 26/02/2011
You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute. You are avenged 1440 times a day.
Quote 4855by Anonymous on 01/03/2011
Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
Quote 8457by Anonymous on 14/05/2012
Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
Quote 8931by Anonymous on 06/06/2012
Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
Quote 8999by Anonymous on 09/06/2012
Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.
Quote 9127by Anonymous on 20/06/2012
Growth itself contains the germ of happiness.
Quote 9667by Anonymous on 14/08/2012
Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
Quote 10264by Anonymous on 25/09/2012
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
Quote 11066by Anonymous on 20/11/2012
Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.
Quote 11080by Anonymous on 22/11/2012
Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
Quote 11142by Anonymous on 27/11/2012
Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
Quote 11165by Anonymous on 29/11/2012
Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.
Quote 11236by Anonymous on 02/12/2012
Experience comprises illusions lost, rather than wisdom gained.
Quote 11303by Anonymous on 12/12/2012
Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.
Quote 11621by Anonymous on 12/01/2013
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
Quote 11723by Anonymous on 18/01/2013
Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
Quote 11963by Anonymous on 06/02/2013
Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
Quote 12165by Anonymous on 12/03/2013
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
Quote 12555by Anonymous on 27/04/2013
Christmas carols always brought tears to my eyes. I also cry at weddings. I should have cried at a couple of my own.
Quote 12978by Anonymous on 07/06/2013
History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
Quote 13017by Anonymous on 11/06/2013
Women in love are less ashamed than men. They have less to be ashamed of.
Quote 13142by Anonymous on 22/06/2013
Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
Quote 13214by Anonymous on 28/06/2013
Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
Quote 13524by Anonymous on 01/08/2013
Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
Quote 13870by Anonymous on 13/09/2013
Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
