| <nick> | FUCKING HELL!!!! |
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<nick> | I swear one day I'm just gonna go and hunt down every stupid bitch on earth and put them out of their misery... |
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<R4an0m> | ? |
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<nick> | Ok, theres this resteraunt just down the road from me where I eat every now and then.. other night I go in for dinner with my girlfriend. After drinking half a bottle of wine, my bowls begin to complain, so I head to the bathroom |
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<nick> | I use the urinal and turn towards the sink and start to zip up at the same time when in walks this young girl of about 18, quite nice looking, and there I am with my dick still halfway out of my pants... |
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<nick> | so I turn pretty damn fast in the other direction and zip up, then turn back expecting to find she'd dissapeared, only to discover that not only hadn't she left, she'd let the door shut and walked in a couple of steps towards me. Now I'm pretty embarrassed and point out to her that she had gone through the wrong door. |
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<nick> | She tells me that no she didn't and then she fucking reaches down and grabs my dick through my pants! I take a quick step backwards and ask her what the hell does she think she's doing (I mean shit what would happen if I wandered into the ladies and started feeling people up??).. she gets this disgusted look on her face and turns round, storms out the bathroom |
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<nick> | Now I'm left standing there going "what the fuck just happened??" for about a minute, then wash my hands and head back to the resteranut... only to be greeted by the young lady, the resteraunt manager and some 7 foot tall, 4 foot wide dude with "Security" written on his shirt. Alarm bells proceed to go off in my head, but I stay calm and ask what the problem is |
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<nick> | the manager tells me the young lady (known from here on in as the bitch) has complained about me sexually harassing her when she accidently walked into the wrong bathroom! |
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<nick> | I resist the urge to walk over and punch her, and try to explain my version of what happened. At this point the bitch pipes up and calls me a "lying son of a bitch" that was a "menace to society" |
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<nick> | so I think "right I'll fix you" and turn to her and say "look you stupid bitch, you came onto me, I turned you down, what kind of sad pathetic loser are you, that you have to hit on random guys in a bathroom anyway? Get over it, you lost, no need to get all bitchy over it." |
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<nick> | I figure now she'll either shut up or totally lose it and start screaming at me, but alas, I was mistaken about how fucked I truely was. Instead of shutting up, she looked at me for a second then burst into tears, before turning to the manager and saying inbetween sobs.... |
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<nick> | ".....you're not going let him say that to me, are you daddy?" |
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<R4an0m> | aahahahahahaa!! |
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<nick> | so now Im sore from being thrown out the door by that bouncer, and I got a vist from the police this morning telling me I was being charged with sexual assault.. :(. |