| <Goatroper> | so i had a checkup at the doctor a couple months ago |
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<Goatroper> | i waited in the goddamn lobby for like 2 hours |
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<Goatroper> | i was just starting to doze off when they called me back into one of the exam rooms |
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<Goatroper> | so i sit on this chair for like 30 more mins, and then fall asleep |
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<Goatroper> | i wake up and have no idea what time it is or how long i've been waiting |
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<Goatroper> | so 20 minutes later after I finished reading the Hispanic Business Weekly |
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<Goatroper> | I start diggin through the drawers in the exam table and his desk drawer |
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<Goatroper> | i find some hypos and don't touch them, some dressing gowns, and then i get to the drawer marked "OB/GYN" |
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<Goatroper> | i open it up, take a peeky-peek inside, and what do I see? Speculums and rectal dilators. |
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<Goatroper> | At this point I'm in his desk rolly-chair |
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<Goatroper> | with about 40 rubber gloves in my pockets for later use |
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<Goatroper> | so I grab a speculum in each hand |
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<Goatroper> | and start making them sing and talk like little ducks |
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<Goatroper> | i was rooting around for a sharpie and couldn't find one |
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<Goatroper> | so i put them down and did my glove-trick |
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<Goatroper> | i stretched a rubber glove over my head and blew it up |
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<Goatroper> | then i grabbbed the speculums and started spinning around in his chair |
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<Goatroper> | glove inflated on my head the size of two basketballs |
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<Goatroper> | speculum in each hand |
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<Goatroper> | spinning in his office chair |
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<Goatroper> | i hear footsteps and as i'm extending my legs to slow down, the door opens |
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<Goatroper> | the doctor is standing there with my chart in his hand |
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<kr0nus> | omg |
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<Goatroper> | i stopped spinning and just sat there, looking at him through the thin film of the glove |
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<Goatroper> | he was like "Corey.....?" |
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<Goatroper> | I said "Yep." |
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<Goatroper> | held up the speculums. |
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<Goatroper> | said, "I got bored." |
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<Goatroper> | and he was like "That's quite a trick with those gloves. Where did you learn that?" |
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<Goatroper> | I said "Many doctor's offices in many states." |
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<Goatroper> | He was like "You want to take some with you?" as I got up |
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<Goatroper> | I pulled the wad out of my pocket and said "Already did." |
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<Goatroper> | then I walked out and i heard him laughing like a goddamn maniac as soon as the door was closed |
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<Goatroper> | then the other day i go in again rofl and he just hands me a brand new unopened box of 100 gloves |
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<Goatroper> | i was gonna ask for some speculums just to fuck with him but I was afraid he'd give me some |